Leading With Love, Friendship, Purpose and Conviction
J. R. R. Tolkien did a masterful job of writing in a way that gives us lessons we can apply to our lives. I am a big believer in leaders showing love toward those we serve. That love is agape or charity. In The Gospel According to Tolkien: Visions of the Kingdom in Middle-Earth by Ralph C. Wood, Wood pointed out how Tolkien addressed friendship and love. First he points out a paradox, saying, “…when doing the most difficult things for the sake of the Good, they become astonishingly effortless.” Purpose and conviction can transform hardship into a noble, almost effortless pursuit.
“My yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:30)
Frodo’s journey to destroy the Ring is fraught with peril and hardship, yet his resolve is fueled by a desire to protect Middle-earth from evil. His commitment makes the difficult path seem less burdensome, as his motivation aligns with a higher purpose. Similarly, Gandalf’s sacrifices and bravery often appear effortless because they stem from his deep sense of duty and moral clarity.
The other important piece to this is how friendship and love come into play. Frodo’s friendship with Sam and Sam’s love for Frodo are also discussed. Sam described Frodo as a friend whose worth is beyond all estimate. This friendship is philia. In The Four Loves, C. S. Lewis pointed out that friendship is the one love that is not diminished when it is divided. I believe Tolkien was mixing two loves here reminding us the importance of relationships. In a friendship (philia) we also love in a charitable (agape) way wanting to help the other person be successful. I love how Tolkien showed how both loves can simultaneously be in practice.
It is also amazing that Tolkien had Sam actually say of Frodo, “I love him.” Merry and Pippin also get in on the act. Wood explained that in Merry said, “You can trust us to stick with you through thick and thin-to the bitter end. And you can trust us to keep any secret of yours-closer than you keep it yourself. But you cannot trust us to let you face trouble alone, and go off without a word. We are your friends, Frodo” (The Fellowship of the Ring, p. 115-16). We can learn from these characters that when undertaking challenging tasks driven by genuine goodness and in the company of friends, our efforts transcend mere struggle and feel almost natural.
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