Byron's Babbles

Remember Who You Are And Be Okay With It

IMG_3778One of my favorite compliments to give someone is: “Thanks for being YOU!” I believe it is a powerful compliment because it implies that what makes that person such a unique human being comes from deep within. What I am trying to do is give unconditional gratitude. I want the person to remember who they are and be okay with it. When I say, “Thanks for being YOU!” I am not just saying thank you for what the person has done – I am saying thank you for who he or she is. I am telling him or her that I value them as a person.

“Thanks for being YOU!” Even for all the mistakes the person made and the flaws he or she found that they want to change. For the times he or she did and the times he or she could not, for one day they will all add up. Any of us at our best is what serves us all best. We need each of us to be who we are in order to shape the future. We grow into being who we are one day at a time. We need everyone’s contribution. We need your contribution as much as mine. It’s something we build as much as we find, to do either takes a present mind.

Remember, you are not a robot or a Barbie™. Therefore, let’s be who we are and be okay with it. This does not mean that we should not work to improve or learn new things. It means we need to be okay with who we are as we continue to improve and evolve as the person we are. I believe every person is a work of art. Research indicates that our capacity for self-evolution and growth of our personality, mental capacities, relationships and actions are all based on conscious intent. Shaping our being is like making art; the same way an artist develops, evolves and creates a painting; or a composer creates music. We can all make our conscious being and all that emanates from it a work of art. As I always say, “There is no bad art.” So let’s go out there and remember who we are and be okay with it.

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Just As I Am

Posted in appreciation, Community, Culture, Educational Leadership, Leadership, Memories, Servant Leadership by Dr. Byron L. Ernest on December 25, 2018

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting this Christmas season. With the passing of my mom in 2018, it is the first holiday season that I am parentless. That has been a point of great reflection since May. For a kid that was close to his parents, it is very weird to now not have any. As I think about the holidays, I got to thinking that I really don’t remember the gives, but have lots of memories of things we did together. For example, every year we would go to Indianapolis and walk around the “Worlds Tallest Christmas Tree.” My dad would stop in the little nut shop (not there any more) and by a bag of cashews and we would eat them as we walked. It was a Christmas tradition. You get the idea.

Circle Christmas Tree, Indianapolis

We now have some great traditions we do as a family like picking out the Christmas tree, going to Metamora, Indiana, the Carmel Christkindlmarkt, or go to the Music City Bowl to watch Purdue beat Auburn (we can’t wait). But, none of this involves presents. These are memory building activities. As we enter this holiday season, it makes sense to pause for a moment and think about gifts. What’s the point of them?

I guess we give gifts because we’re supposed to. On certain occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, dinner parties, the end of the year it just seems to be customary. Allegedly, we give people gifts to show them that we are grateful for them and value the role they play in our lives. But don’t forget, gifts don’t express appreciation, people do. And when people don’t express it, neither do their gifts. The greatest gifts I will receive this holiday season will be time spent making memories and being accepted for who I am.

Just as I am. Wow, is there any better present than being acknowledged and appreciated for who you are? There is no more powerful way to acknowledge others than to be thankful for them just as they are. Our families are the masters at this. We need to work really hard at genuinely doing this for those we work with, our friends and associates, and those we lead. So maybe instead of the gift card, an individualized note of appreciation or some way of building a memory. Remember, memories, not materials are what make the season so magical.