Leading Like Buc-ee
The greatest leaders are exemplars. As leaders we must be authentic but at the same time embody the values and ideas we espouse. Successful businesses that are considered leaders in the industry must also embody what they espouse to do. I love the word “embody,” which according to the Cambridge Dictionary, means “to represent a quality or an idea exactly.” This embodiment of our values and authenticity becomes infectious.
If you don’t believe that, stop at a Buc-ee’s the next time you are traveling. They are “committed to providing a clean, friendly, and in stock experience for our customers.” The key word here is “experience.” Going to Buc-ee’s is an experience. I’ve written about this experience before in Smiles For All Your Miles.
You’ll find the cleanest and best designed restrooms, great food, any other item you might need, AND the cheapest fuel. This past weekend when traveling to Shelbyville, Tennessee I stopped at the Buc-ee’s in Smiths Grove, Kentucky. Gas was $2.89/gallon when I left home and was $2.19/gallon at Buc-ee’s with the nearest station in Smiths Grove being $2.41/gallon.
Yes, it is crowded and sometimes a little nuts, but, as I said, it is always an experience. And the experience always embodies the commitment to providing a clean, friendly, and in stock experience for customers. Lines move quickly and the Buc-ee’s employees are super friendly and helpful. I love stopping there and if Buc-ee is there, I always get my picture taken with the mascot (see the featured photo). Buc-ee’s is a reminder we must embody what we espouse as leaders. In other words, walk the talk.
Being Friendly Like Frisch’s® Big Boy®
Yesterday, I had an amazing time going to Shelbyville, Tennessee to visit my friends at Uncle Nearest Distillery (more on that it a future post). On the way we stopped at my favorite place to eat, Frisch’s Big Boy. Now, if you have never experienced a Big Boy®; you need to! It’s iconic. Frisch’s Big Boy is the original “craveable homemade foods.” After we ate and were back on the road I told my wife that I was always impressed with how friendly everyone was at Frisch’s.
That is by design. Frisch’s® brand promise is, “Good fun happens over great food served by friendly faces.” It has always interested me how much relationship building and fun happen around meals. I’m also a big believer that successful leadership involves inspiring teams to deliver memorable moments that combine quality, fun, and genuine care. It is always clear when entering a Frisch’s Big Boy that a culture where warmth and genuine friendliness are at the core of every customer interaction has been created and fostered.
As leaders, we can take away from this that we must not just deliver excellent service but also a joyful and friendly experience. We must create an ethos of enhanced customer satisfaction, building strong relationships, and cultivating a sense of community. As they say, “Frisch’s Big Boy is a place where one meal can make your entire day.” Are you creating that kind of friendly atmosphere?
Being Thankful for Sportsmanship AND We Need More of It
Happy Thanksgiving from the United States. Thanksgiving is an interesting holiday in that other countries also celebrate Thanksgiving on other days and in different ways. I love that Brazil, for example celebrates Dia de Ação de Graças (Day of Thanksgiving) on the same day as us. It is not an official holiday like ours, but celebrated by many Brazilians nonetheless. Joaquim Nabuco, who was Brazil’s ambassador to the United States in the 1940s was so impressed with Thanksgiving in the United States that he proposed celebrating Dia de Ação de Graças in Brazil.
One of our traditions here in the U.S. is watching football on Thanksgiving. As I was reflecting on Thanksgiving this morning I was reminded of something Knute Rockne wrote: “Sportsmanship is simply a corollary of the Golden Rule. You want to play your best; hence, you take no advantage that will prevent the other fellow from doing the same. You respect him, as you want him to respect you.” Today I am thankful for all those who practice value, practice, and model sportsmanship. We need even more to do so.
In that same piece, Rockne also wrote, “…what the world most needs today is a spirit of sportsmanship among nations…The world needs sportsmanship. The rules of fair play and clean play must be read into international politics and economic relations, if universal peace is to come and to stay.” Whether it is sportsmanship or the Golden Rule, I would agree that we, still today, need more of it in the world today.
As Calvin Coolidge said of Rockne, “Right living and right thinking went into his victories.” I, for one, am thankful that we have Knute Rockne’s example to follow. My Thanksgiving wish is for us all to be more sportsmanlike.
Leading With Humility
I am really loving the Father Brown Stories by G.K. Chesterton. I’m only about a quarter of the way through the book, but my favorite story so far is in Chapter 9, “The Hammer of God.” At one point in the story, Father Brown asserts, “Humility is the mother of giants. One sees great things from the valley; only small things from the peak.” I had seen that quote from Chesterton before, but now in the context of the story it was powerful metaphor.
We have to be very careful of letting our pride take us to high and mighty places where others begin to appear small to us. Chesterton went on to say in that story, “But he saw all men walking about like insects.” We need to be careful to not let ourselves get too comfortable on the peak and looking down on others. Think of how beautiful the view looking up at the mountain with others around us is.
I am reminded of Drybar’s seventh core value: “7. Nothing is sexier than honesty and humility!” I wrote about this in Becoming Humble. Learning from and with others, asking questions, and asking for help are hallmarks of an effective and humble leader.
Conveying More Than Literal Meaning
I have always stressed that language matters. It matters a lot! I love that G.K. Chesterton, through the character of Father Brown in the Father Brown Stories, explored themes of human nature, morality, and the importance of understanding others. Chesterton’s stories emphasize that sometimes the true understanding of a mystery or a person’s motives requires insight into their character and the use of common sense, rather than superficial judgments.
In Chapter 5 – The Invisible Man, Father Brown said, “Have you ever noticed this—that people never answer what you say? They answer what you mean—or what they think you mean.” He then went on to give this example: “Suppose one lady says to another in a country house, ‘Is anybody staying with you?’ the lady doesn’t answer ‘Yes; the butler, the three footmen, the parlourmaid, and so on,’ though the parlourmaid may be in the room, or the butler behind her chair. She says ‘There is nobody staying with us,’ meaning nobody of the sort you mean. But suppose a doctor inquiring into an epidemic asks, ‘Who is staying in the house?’ then the lady will remember the butler, the parlourmaid, and the rest.” This highlighted a common human tendency we have to focus more on interpreting the underlying meaning or intent behind what someone says rather than merely responding to the literal words.
Chesterton went on to tell us in the story that, “All language is used like that; you never get a question answered literally, even when you get it answered truly.” Chesterton was pointing out that people often listen for the implied message, assumptions, or emotions beneath the surface, rather than taking questions at their face value.
This observation encourages us to be more aware of the nuances in communication—recognizing that conversations are frequently about understanding intentions and context, not just the explicit words spoken. It also reminds us to be mindful of how our own words might be interpreted, intentionally or unintentionally conveying more than their literal meaning. Again, language matters!
Being Thankful for Leaders and Followers
One of the things I love doing in my portfolio of services is mentoring 126 first through fourth grade high ability students for Hamilton Heights Elementary School. I love doing this because it keeps me in a teaching mode with students. As a person who coaches/mentors teachers it is important for me to stay connected facilitating learning for students. Another thing I love is the inspiration that comes from working with these students. Yesterday, while working with third graders we were discussing being thankful, and gratitude. I had them reflect on what they were thankful and grateful for.
One young man in the third grade class said he was thankful for leaders and was also thankful for followers. I was blown away. This was a third grader discussing leaders and followers. How cool is that? I asked him to explain. He told the group that leaders inspire and followers support. Pretty impressive right? Most adults don’t fully understand the importance of the leader-follower relationship.
Make no mistake, I believe everyone is a leader, but we also have to fill the follower role. Both followers and leaders are important because each plays a vital role in creating a positive and productive environment. Leaders inspire, guide, and set the direction, while followers support, provide feedback, and help implement the vision. When we appreciate both, we foster mutual respect, collaboration, and a sense of shared purpose. This gratitude encourages teamwork, strengthens relationships, and helps everyone feel valued, which ultimately leads to greater success and growth for the entire group.
This all reminded me of a discussion we had in a leadership program at the University of Oxford Saïd Business School during by Scholar in Residence program with the C. S. Lewis Foundation at The Kilns. Our professor stressed that an organization’s success relies on “followership.” Followers are many times underrepresented in leadership frameworks. The relationship between leader and follower is an important part of the organization’s culture.
When an environment is created for everyone to be a leader, followers are simultaneously leaders with the capacity for independent and critical thinking. My Oxford friends stressed that there are five distinct styles of followers:
- Effective follower
- Conformist
- Passive follower
- Alienated follower
- Pragmatic survivor
Being an effective follower involves continuous learning and growth. These are key to improving our contributions and staying aligned with our team’s evolving needs. Combine this with respect and collaboration by maintaining a positive attitude, valuing others’ perspectives, and working together toward shared goals. Embracing these qualities fosters a productive, respectful, and successful environment for everyone.
Leading Like Admiral William McRaven
I was so impressed by Admiral William H. McRaven’s keynote yesterday morning at ExcelinEd’s National Summit on Education. He began by saying, “If you are not a person of character, you will struggle in leadership and will really struggle leading in a crisis.” With this comment he really grabbed my attention. I was also reminded of how Angela Duckworth had defined character the day before in her great keynote: “Character is all the things you habitually do, think, say, and feel that are good for others and good for you.” Having encountered leaders in my career that lacked character, all this really resonated with me. To me, character is the “walk” part of “walk the talk.” Character encapsulates how we act and what we do. Whereas, “talk” is the values part of “walk the talk.” Those leaders I mentioned earlier talked a big game of values, but then we never saw the actions, or character. We cannot just say we will do the right thing, we have to actually know what the right thing is and do the right thing. Character is all about our habits. Thus why Admiral McRaven said the leader without character would struggle, especially in a crisis when our character really shows.
“The truth will always, always, always, come out.” ~ Admiral William H. McRaven
Admiral McRaven also shared leadership lessons from his great book, Conquering Crisis: Ten Lessons To Learn Before You Need Them. He outlined five key leadership components:
- Assess: we need procedures for getting facts and evaluating the quality of the information. We need a group of trusted advisors – what McRaven called a Council of Colonels. This is an advisory group that will speak the truth to power.
- Report: I love what the Admiral said here: “Always tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.” Also he told us to, “Use truth and transparency to show you understand the problem.” This helps us to personify the crisis.
- Contain: one point Admiral McRaven made here that really stood out to me here was to, “slow the pace of the crisis with one strong decisive move directed at the fastest-moving concern.” This involves us, as leaders taking control of the crisis and dictating the tempo.
- Shape: we need to actively influence situations and control the narrative. The Admiral told us to, “weaponize the truth.” He urged us to, as leaders, mold the circumstances and perception of the crisis so our organizations come out stronger on the other side, rather than just surviving it.
- Manage: This point said it all: “Reinforce your actions with a resource heavy approach to dictate the tempo and shape the outcome.” In other words, as I stated in the beginning paragraph of this post: “walk the talk”.
I love that in a conversation after his keynote with Jeb Bush, Admiral McRaven discussed the need for leaders to be humble and have the humility to listen and learn first. He discussed having a great team around him so he finish this sentence: “I need to understand…” I’ll conclude this post by saying that Admiral McRaven is one of America’s great and iconic leaders. His record shows him to be a man of character who has walked the talk and walked the walk.
Needed Therefore Belonging
I am a huge believer in “belonging.” Whether it is students in our schools or adults in our organizations, everyone needs to belong. This “belonging” is central to our engagement. When we believe that our presence and contributions matter, we feel more connected to our community—be it a classroom or a broader social environment. This sense of connection fosters trust, safety, and acceptance, making us, whether a student or adult, more comfortable to express themselves and participate actively. As a result, we develop a stronger sense of belonging, which enhances their confidence, motivation, and overall well-being. In essence, when we feel needed and appreciated, we are more likely to feel that we truly belong, supporting our growth and success.
Also, let’s not forget that along with love, belonging is on Maslow’s five tier hierarchy model of human needs. While we used to think of this hierarchy more linearly than we now know it to be, Maslow showed love/belonging to be right after physiological and safety needs. We now know that we seek multiple needs simultaneously.
Yesterday at ExcelinEd’s National Summit on Education, Angela Duckworth told us that “Every student needs to be needed.” 🎤 I loved this and thought it was a drop the mic moment. Angela Duckworth meant that every student should feel valued and important—that their presence and contributions matter. When students feel needed, it boosts their confidence, motivation, and sense of belonging, which are essential for their growth and success. She emphasized the importance of fostering environments where students recognize their importance to others, helping them develop resilience and a positive sense of self.
As leaders, let’s make sure everyone belongs!
Embracing Curiosity and Compassion: Timeless Lessons from Father Brown
Scholars have asserted that G. K. Chesterton’s character, Father Brown, has imaginative empathy. This type of empathy, as demonstrated by Father Brown in Chesterton’s stories, refers to the ability to genuinely understand and share the feelings, thoughts, and perspectives of others by using imagination and intuition. Unlike simple sympathy or rational analysis, imaginative empathy involves immersing oneself into another’s experience, often seeing the world from their point of view, even when it’s unfamiliar or complex.
From Father Brown, we learn that:
- Deep understanding fosters trust. When we, as leaders, take the time to empathize genuinely, we create stronger connections and trust with others.
- Insight leads to better decision-making. By placing ourselves in others’ shoes, we can uncover underlying motives or truths that might otherwise be missed.
- Creativity and problem-solving thrive when we embrace curiosity. Imaginative empathy encourages flexible thinking, allowing one to approach challenges from multiple perspectives.
- Emulating Father Brown’s curiosity helps us cultivate a more compassionate and open-minded attitude towards others.
By adopting imaginative empathy we enhance our ability to connect, innovate, and lead with insight and kindness—qualities essential for personal growth and effective leadership.
Leading With Questions Like Father Brown
Having just finished G. K. Chesterton’s Heretics, I began reading his Father Brown Stories. I’m only two stories in and I am already completely enthralled. Chesterton described Father Brown this way: “Father Brown had the kind of head that cannot help asking questions.”From this description we can draw valuable lessons about curiosity in leadership.
We can be a curious leader, like Father Brown. We just need to demonstrate a genuine interest in understanding different perspectives, uncovering underlying issues, and exploring new ideas. This inquisitiveness can foster a culture of continuous learning, encourage openness, and builds trust within our organizations. By asking thoughtful questions and really listening to understand the answers we receive, we invite collaboration, empower others to share their insights, and identify opportunities for growth and improvement.
Let’s face it, curiosity fuels innovation and resilience. It helps leaders stay adaptable, make informed decisions, and connect more deeply with their team members. Emulating Father Brown’s inquisitiveness can lead to a more engaged, creative, and high-performing environment in our organizations.
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