Byron's Babbles

C.S. Lewis wrote about inner circles in “The Inner Ring.” I would encourage you to read it. In the “The Inner Ring” was the Memorial Lecture he gave at King’s College London, in 1944. In this lecture Lewis explored the desire to belong and be accepted by an exclusive group (inner circle) and how it can affect individuals. Lewis warned, “The circle cannot have from within the charm it had from outside. By the very act of admitting you it has lost its magic. Once the first novelty is worn off the members of this circle will be no more interesting than your old friends. Why should they be? You were not looking for virtue or kindness or loyalty or humor or learning or wit or any of the things that can be really enjoyed. You merely wanted to be “in.” And that is a pleasure that cannot last. As soon as your new associates have been staled to you by
custom, you will be looking for another Ring.” Here, Lewis was suggesting that being part of an exclusive inner circle will lose its allure once we are actually inside it. The charm and allure come from the perception and longing to be a part of that particular group, but once we are on the inside, we may realize that it is not as special as it seemed. In other words, the exclusivity itself may not provide the satisfaction or fulfillment that one might expect.

Lewis used the metaphor of the onion in “The Inner Ring.” He posited that the inner ring is like peeling an onion – once you have succeeded, there is nothing left. I am going to guess you are all like me and have been parts of inner circles. Additionally, I would guess we have all worked in environments with a distinct inner circle we were not a part of. I have worked for two organizations that had/still have distinct inner rings that I was not invited into. Nor, were most of the others really doing the work. It’s toxic to a great collaborative work community. Especially when the top, hierarchically speaking, person is the ring leader (pun intended). This also, as you well know, in our government and law-making circles (again, pun intended).

“Sweet is a legacy, and passing sweet
The unexpected death of some old lady.” ~ Lord Byron

Lord Byron quoted by C. S. Lewis in “The Inner Ring”

While Lewis acknowledges that being part of an inner circle is not inherently bad, there can be negative aspects associated with it. Wanting to get into an inner circle can can lead to being seen as exclusionary. The negative in some situations is that the inner ring can lead to the formation of cliques, or other exclusionary, behavior which can and create feelings of create isolation an and rejection unhealthy sense for those who of are not included. Additionally, seeking validation among the group or self-worth members. solely from Inner rings can also perpetuate an exclusive inequality and favoritism group that is unhealthy and limiting personal growth for those both in and outside the ring. An inner circle can shut out others who may have valuable perspectives and contributions to offer. It’s important to foster inclusivity and recognize that meaningful connections should be formed outside an inner ring.

I close with the recognition that it is in our very nature to desire being in the inner ring. Lewis told us, “…at all periods between infancy and
extreme old age, one of the most dominant elements is the desire to be inside the local Ring and the terror of being left outside.” We just need to remember it is never as satisfying on the inside as it looked from the outside and is terrifying when we realize we are no longer on the inside.