Define Your Own Self Worth

It is important to take care of ourselves and not let the actions of others define our self-worth. The awesome band From Ashes To New has a new song, “Hope Your Happy.” I heard an interview with the band on Serius XM Octane where a band member discussed that the song was about that person who continually stabs us in the back (figuratively of course), demeans or puts us down, or wants to change us, and then wants us to thank and praise them for it. At first, I thought, “Wow, how terrible is that!” Then in reflecting I realized I had experienced a leader, scratch that – let’s call the person a non-leader, like this. When the person was not around everyone would discuss how the person was causing misery. Then when the person was around, everyone would sing a happy song. In the song it says “Should I sing you a happy song?” I guess everyone felt they had to.

This non-leader was always trying to change people and get them to conform. And then expected praise and gratitude for it. As the lyrics say, “And act like I should thank you for the suffering; It’s killing me inside; I’m tired of being someone else; Let me be myself.” The subject matter of this song is clearly not happy, but the situation is real in relationships and the workplace. We need to, at the very least, establish personal and professional boundaries to protect ourselves from people like this. This may involve limiting interactions, in my case with the non-leader, or person, setting clear expectations for how you should be treated, and maintaining a healthy work-life balance. We need to also take an introspective look at ourselves to make sure we are not exhibiting any of these behaviors in our personal or professional lives.

Byron's Babbles