Byron's Babbles

This week I was having a conversation with a new friend and colleague who shared that at one point in her life those close to her were not reading the “smoke signals” she was sending. When they finally did, they were able to offer advice and support, but it had almost come too late. This really resonated with me. These smoke signals can work two ways – 1. we need to recognize and receive smoke signals; and, 2. we need to send smoke signals. As leaders, using emotional smoke signals involves being attuned to the emotions and needs of those we serve. This can include actively acknowledging others concerns, providing empathetic support, and creating a safe space for open communication. Again, we have a need to recognize these smoke signals and in addition we need to be sending these smoke signals for others. In my new friends case it had taken years for those in her life to see the smoke signals and give her the support and affirmation toward the feelings she was having that she needed. As leaders and friends we need to learn to recognize the alarm bells and reach out to those in need in soft and vulnerable ways, to be responsive and accessible.

By effectively interpreting and responding to the emotional cues (smoke signals), leaders can better understand the individuals they serve and provide the necessary support and guidance. Additionally, demonstrating empathy and compassion can help build trust and strengthen relationships within the organization. Smoke signals are such an apt metaphor as an ancient form of communication, symbolizing our attempts to reach out and connect, despite the emotional distance that may be between us.

These smoke signals also allow us to make sure that those we care about do not become anonymous. Every person represents a different dimension of diversity and we need to be creating an environment where each is able to bring a unique and valuable perspective. Our need for belonging is what drives us to long and stable relationships. I just did a training session on belonging this past week and I talked about how after our physiological and safety needs, belonging was next in the hierarchy. I believe belonging and reading the smoke signals go hand in hand here. Organizations where people can share their insecurities with their leaders will feel accepted, and team members whose leader is there to work with them through tough and touchy topics feel supported. All of this involves the sending and receiving of smoke signals.

If we want to develop our emotional fitness we must look for the information signals calling for action; or what I am calling “Smoke Signals” in this post. These smoke signals can be something we need to interpret or something we need to send. In this context, our emotions are not a place to which we’re consigned, but rather signals of valuable information on which to act. These signals allow for intentional action to serve our own best interests, as well as the best interest of those we serve.